Guest Post: How LGBTQ People Can Survive Thanksgiving in a President-Elect Trump World

Ahead of Thanksgiving, Steven Petrow, who writes the “Civilities” column about LGBTQ and straight social dilemmas for the “Washington Post,” wrote about how to gather around the Thanksgiving table with Trump supporters. If you have a question, you can email him at

To brine or not to brine the turkey used to be the hot-button topic that divided families on Thanksgiving. Not this year, especially for many in the LGBTQ community, who are trying to decide whether to break bread with their family members who supported President-elect Donald Trump. That’s because Trump and some of his closest advisers are widely seen as racist, anti-Semitic, misogynist and homophobic. This year the tough questions are: To boycott or not to boycott? And if you decide to sit down together, how do you protect yourself from any gloating or vitriol?

“I’m not so much scared to go home as I am dreading it,” said Dustin Miller, a 29-year old gay man who messaged me this week when I asked Facebook readers for their holiday survival strategies in the wake of the election results.

Minutes later I heard from a married lesbian and mom who comes from a Mormon family. “I struggle not to be the one to push them away,” she wrote, “but this is bigger than just having a difference of opinion — they are against a fundamental aspect of who I am.” Yes, Trump’s election and the extremist positions he’s trumpeted are in a category of their own.

Many of the Facebook messages ended with pleas for advice: “Should I call them out on their views?” “Must I go?” And my favorite, in the lighthearted bracket, “Other than drinking myself stupid, any suggestions on surviving?”

Click here to read the rest of Petrow’s advice.